Our Big Fat Torajanese Wedding #rrtpsirwio

Next April would mark our fifth anniversary. Anyone who has been through the process of wedding preparation would know how hectic and crazy weddings really are. I, like many other brides, became a bridezilla. It was pretty intense. But in the end, the celebration was lovely, we had fun, (most of the) pictures were amazing.

One guest actually said that it was the biggest and most elaborated wedding he has ever attended lol. No, our wedding was big alright, but it was far from being the biggest ever. That guest was Japanese, a friend of my bestfriend. May be in Japan, people rarely invite thousands of people? Well in makassar many many many many people do.

The first thing we did was to book the venue. We did that right after Pimes and his parents came to meet me and my parents to formally propose. Afterward was the extended family proposal and introduction. As per tradition, the groom-to-be and his extended family visit the house of the bride-to-be for ceremonious proposal and get introduced to her extended family.

And like many other Torajanese, we appointed two family member from each side as head and vice of the wedding commite. We do know that most wedding committes are formality, but my father has tried to be efficient in the past and didn’t appoint direct family member as head committe. Boy did that cause some major problem. So this time around, we went along with tradition and appoint said committee. Anyway.

Since the beginning, Pimes and I has agreed that "INI PESTANYA MAMA PAPA, KITA CUMA NUMPANG DIKASI KAWIN SAJA". Kasarnya sih. Meaning that altough it’s our wedding, it is also our parents’ party. It wasn’t merely celebrate the couple’s love for each other, but also the celebration of parents’ achiement for raising their kids well. Not to mention the union of two families. That’s why we decided to be reasonable and not insist too strongly to the many decisions that were made. Afterall, our parents were the ones who paid for the entire wedding. Except for the prewedding photos actually, which we paid by ourselves therefore it was 100% my taste and decision. But yeah. Since we both came from big families, and have seen all the drama that happened in our siblings and cousins, we decided to try and avoid arguments with our parents by giving all the final decision to them. Of course we presented our ideas and of course we were the one who’s running around town to book the vendors and everything. But we always got back to our parents so they always had the final say. Even with that in mind, I still got into some tearful arguments with my mother. But that’s wedding preparation, mind you. It costs a lot, involves a lot of people hence many miscommunications and misunderstandings could occured.

Case in point. Like any other bride to be, I have a vision of my own what my wedding gown would be. It would be big, it would be off-white, and so on and so fort. Imagine my frustration when my mom came from Surabaya that she has already made the down payment for my kebaya-wedding gown and all the details are planned and confirmed with the designer. Without asking my opinion first. I was really going to stress about it, then Pimes reminded me about our motto. So that calmed me down. That and the fact that my kebaya-wedding dress was indeed very beautiful and much more expensive than I thought it would be lols. As for the Toraja wedding attire, I didn't even have any thoughts on did. I knew what my sister and sister in law went through in that matter, so I kept my mouth shut. Then again, my mother got us very exquisite songkets directly from Padang and that made into extremely pretty red Toraja wedding attire.

Thankfully my mom agreed to my choice of make up artist and hairdresser, as well as the wedding invitation design. My high school friend did it, and of course it was super pretty. What else. My brother and sister sang "Love is All There Is" at the Holy Matrimony, as well as Monika, Kak Irfy, and a beautiful surprise duet from Yeyen and Erwin. As for the reception, our parents invites thousands of family and friends. My mom got anxious and order more food two days before the wedding, so food was overflown. She said, "better have leftovers than not have enough and be talked about for years. we can packed and share any leftovers." I asked my friends to put their best attire on, if they can, because I think that would elevate the whole event. And it did. One of my friends actually wrote on Path, "Kak Ella's Grammy-wedding". I assumed she wrote Grammy because all the faboulousness? hopefully lols. I invited about twenty or so foreign friends of my best friend, so they could experience a Torajanesse wedding party.

That's pretty much what I can remember about my wedding.

#rrtpsirwio
#randomrecollectionofthepastsoiwouldrememberwhenimolder

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